Kadiko Yuva (I DONT UNDERSTAND!)

        Nine months in and I just bought a second pillow! This is a really lame thing to blog about. But to me the pillow shows actual investment in living here, making my life comfortable and really doing this. If the year long application/waiting process, saying goodbye to everyone I know for 2 years, the 27 hour plane ride, the 2 month training and tackling language barriers to form friendships wasn’t enough commitment, this did it in. Also, my bed it terribly uncomfortable—ever since the one time I got food poisoning and literally spend 24 straight hours not moving in bed (only shifting to puke) it left a very distinct and irreversible dip in my cheap thin mattress. I call it my taco bed.

          At 9 months in I assumed I would be fluent in Thimbukushu, or at least close to it. This was a stupid expectation since I was pretty bad at languages in high school. I have certainly progressed from when I first arrived…all the embarrassing mix-ups I had that I am sure people laughed about behind my back…in a loving way. For example; announcing I had ‘diarrhea’ instead of a simple ‘stomach ache’ to a group of giggly teenagers is cringe worthy, or how for a whole week I yelled at the pre-primary kids to ‘SPINACH SPINACH’ instead of the more appropriate, ‘LISTEN LISTEN’. (traditional spinach is mutete/listen is muterere). I do alright now with the language, just alright. I am used to not knowing what is going on with conversations, but when I feel most left out is when I am around girls my own age. The opportunity for friendship is there, but I am only able to just brush the surface of topics. Someone who has been in a situation similar to mine put it nicely with language barriers, you miss being able to have fun and be spontaneous when speaking and conversing (shout out Mrs. McNamera!). I don’t understand jokes made, I can’t make my own jokes or discuss complex thoughts/observations. It is why when I meet up with other volunteers and I get overwhelmed by how much I want to say so it all comes out in very jumbled thoughts.

Instead of talking with the girls my age, I join them for netball. Netball is played a little like basketball, without the dribbling and you can only take three steps at a time. You may think that this would be great way to bond with people, similar to my dance group where no language needed when playing. But netball is weird and I don’t really understand the rules. When they yell instructions at me in Thimbukushu (and they yell) I would almost just rather watch. They won't let me just watch though, which is good and bad. I want to tell them that I used to be good at sports, but I don’t think they would believe me because even I know I look very awkward out there. However, I will persevere and I will continue to embarrass myself! Last week I made a basket and both teams cheered, but only because the previous 45 minutes I kept messing up.

Here are the people in Namibia I can rely on to understand me when I talk at warp speed, no translators needed...